Anna: The Passionate Tomb

fragmentation rouge
ARE YOU HERE?

By Delbert H. Rhodes

 Staring into her eyes, Tony feels wounded by her sorrows. Anna is hurt because she cares for Tony, and though he has produced creative works inspired by others and especially women he has written nothing because of her. Tony aches for Anna, she is special to him and he loves her. Attempting to quell Anna’s anguish, he speaks while holding her hand.

“There is reason that I have not written because of you. My feelings for you are so delicate; they are powerful. I fear that if I were to produce works inspired by you my passions would entomb me. Then for the life of me what could I do.” Her heart pounding Anna begins to tear. She intently listens as Tony continues.

“My dear Anna, you are young, and beautiful and I am much older; your life, your friends are strange worlds to me. We are too different; I could not relate.” (Tony withdraws from his desire to hold Anna.) “You have a boyfriend; you love him. I am alone and I love you. The circle suffers fragmentation, too many obstacles to a meaningful connection. Anna, what should I do? Should I expect you to leave your boyfriend, to surrender all that you are to him, giving up everything you have with him? Am I the fool to dare such thoughts? No, Anna. Yes, sweet woman, I want you; but what should I do and what would become of me?”

Tony’s pleas deeply affect Anna, yet his words ring with sincerity, truth. These last moments, and although all Tony has said she feels and truly knows, still, Anna must honestly acknowledge her passions for Tony. For seven years, she has loved her boyfriend and engagement soon follows. Oh, what should she do? Her eyes welling with torrents the distraught woman says nothing, she sadly turns, and then walks away.

Copyright © 2012 Delbert H. Rhodes

“I Love You”: Would you like to Play?

Representing the famous balcony scene from rom...

By: Delbert H. Rhodes

This discussion represents simplistic momentary thinking about a complicated topic pondered by greater minds. 

Truly, why do we do it?

Saying the following three words possibly could be one of the most confusing and misunderstood and even misguided things we humans share. The words, “I love you,” do a lot of things to a lot of people. Most-times and seemingly, the tendency is more deception than truth. Correct, I love you ends more in “feel” good than “real” good. Is there a difference, in my opinion YES?

Possibly, I love you serves to satisfy the situation. Have you or someone you know ever said; I love you, for immediate personal gratification or for future gain? Sometimes individuals simply have a need to hear the words. I love you is a great equalizer a wonderful tool to level the playing field. Common ground between couples married or not (quickly) surrenders beneath a pleasurable umbrella of psycho-emotional trappings.

Young lovers together for the first time and immersed by emotions, tend to do whatever comes naturally. Here and usually, the guy is the lever behind the teetering rock. “Oh sweetheart, you “know” that I love you….” and then maybe she (willingly) slides over the edge. Sometimes the girl and this has happened to me, needs to hear I love you before surrendering to something she too desires. “Just tell me you love me.” “So lie to me.”

Few guys refuse this offer-I did. You ask why. The reason: I truly cared for and (possibly) loved her too much to take advantage of her, even if she failed to realize the fact. Given proper situation mixed with hope and many times inexperience the curtains fall.

Older and more experienced couples are adept at the game. The wife, asking hubby for something might heighten moments of pleasure to lower his defenses. Hubby running for cover says I love you, dear, to hide.

Young, or, old married, or, unmarried, emotionally and physically, the search, and regarding male female attraction in the animal kingdom, truly is about sex or procreation. The strongest suitor wins the prize.

I love you, is the quickest path through the woods, it lowers the drawbridge, and unlocks the floodgates. Yes, while coursing the wanton waters, all tall and small ships are welcome and most times without lowering the mast.

(Let us never forget the “Take”: The unscrupulous say I love you to separate money from fools, or is it the other way around. Money is a prime mover to a place not too pretty, a place filled by those ready to show (you) the way.)

Doubtless, in the human arena, “I Love You”-emotionally, financially-is the greatest, most fulfilling game we play. Those in the business of promoting and supplying the equipment acquire huge profits. Our modes of dress, girls learning to apply make-up, guys adorning the physique, the choice of automobiles, how we speak move, even intellectual abilities in many ways translate into The Game. Time trains and tests one’s abilities; though, this game has no rules, and is never (completely) understood.

Where does truth live in the foray of foreplay and deception?

Years ago and after a long night on the town, a buddy and I leaned on my couch discussing the antics of love. After hours, it seemed, of pros and cons, to do’s and not to do’s, we agreed that ‘The game is not ‘playing’ the game.’ In other words, the better method of getting what one wants is to refuse to become a part of endless foreplay.

Love and Chess share similarities: each hosting a bed of strategies and tactics, determining outcomes. On the Chess table, the King falls; in Love, the Queen gives way.

In Chess, by feigning to one side of the table, and then successfully rallying the forces to another and unexpected side, the opposing King topples. Ironically, Chess is one of the oldest games of strategic warfare by feudal Lords.

Love too is a form of war, a war of pleasure; and similar to Chess, one of its many feigns is pretension. The female (Queen) permits the male to know she sees him, but ‘allows’ him to pursue her. During this period, the male must prove he is worthy.

If the female is desirable and smart, she is able to hold his attention, staying (just) far enough away to encourage his approach. If all proceeds as she intends, soon the male would be hers, and on her terms.

Alternately, if the male is smarter and understanding of female behavior, he ignores her causing her confusion, she then and “gracefully” returns the gesture (she clearly states her feelings), and then somewhere along the merry way, the victor reaps the spoils.

Additionally, and either directly or indirectly, both individuals share important information, assuring that all is never lost. Deceptively, the trick is to appear as disinterested as possible without chasing away the other person; even using the mechanics of jealousy to help things along.

Variations to the game occur; but still, the results are (sometimes) the same. The two unite to become ‘happily argumentative.’

The Chess table though deceptive also renders a form of truth, for those understanding the deeper objectives of the game. Truth: Knowledgeable players understand and therefore enter the game with three stages in mind; one, the Opening; two, the Mid Game; and three, the End Game: each stage representative and determines whether one or the other player would eventually win or lose.

Love too has three stages, one, Foreplay, two, “I’m Hot for You,” and three, the “You’ve Changed” stage, or the “Work” stage. In stage three individuals finally (begin to) see each other. The view sometimes may not be worth the climb. After trials and tribulations, the couple decides either to remain united, or, separate, (only) to begin the process with someone new. Or Not.

As with Chess individuals enter into relationships with the belief that the outcomes are worthy of the venture. The ultimate end is marriage and with children; and along the way, the individual variations could be as imaginable as they are manageable. There is but one definite, and that is, if things fail to work out the relationship disconnects.

Okay, earlier we spoke of truth. Saying I Love You occurs whenever someone has deep feelings for another person. All too often it is customary to (have to) “prove” one’s feelings. Throughout the relationship, couples (are expected to) behave in such ways, which demonstrate “YES, I DO LOVE YOU….SEEEEE!”

In search of assistance with relationships and building trust and saving marriages, individuals seek the comfortable couches of favorite and/ or well known Psyho-Therapists or Certified Counselors, and at great expense; these professional thinkers tell them (oops!), help them to understand the issues.

Perhaps the better mode would be-to-actually BECOME the one thing each partner wants…TRUST. This is a huge hurdle and most humans fail in the jump. Something about the run down the lane before engaging the apparatus (hurdle) interferes with facilitation, with truth.

I love you is powerful and rests deep within the recesses of one’s heart, and soul and from the inception in its expression should be sensed/felt by BOTH individuals. (Good luck with that (?). This mechanism removes the unnecessary behaviors of “proof” restoring and solidifying an immovable foundation more immortal than the Herculean Pillars. True Love is about FEELINGS not proving them.

Therefore, the next time he says, “I Love You,” and the first time she says, “I Love You, too” do not simply believe but FEEL it.

Truth of the matter: In the game of love the queries have no answers; and all willing to play must be willing to risk. At times, risks are great.

Copyright (c) 2012 Delbert H. Rhodes


Drawing with Words: A Matter of Feelings

Job SearchBy Delbert H. Rhodes

Jonathan walks into the office: seated behind a highly polished hardwood desk the executive is busy handling a telephone call. Feeling somewhat uncomfortable, but confident, he stands and waits. Following a few long minutes the phone call ends, the executive smiles stands and then graciously extends her hand. Jonathan steps forward returning the gesture. They sit and then he explains his reason for coming to her office.

The man is impeccably dressed, and in his possession a file of resumes and a package containing a framed poem. “I am seeking employment with your company,” he begins. The executive, and Jonathan discuss his professional history and he clearly outlines how he might be a valuable addition to her team. Noting his career experiences, and though she highly regards them and him, the executive is not sure (exactly) how he may fit the scheme of things.

The business caters to the industry of artists. Historically: the newly renovated theatre once hosted some of the greats of music acting and film. Some famous people actually started here.

Jonathan is not an artist: he does not paint or draw, and he has minimal business background. He has experience in Real Estate and some Marketing, but this may not be enough, she listens as he continues.

Jonathan explores, and paints a vivid picture of him and his abilities. He speaks of the days when he worked in town recreation, of the many summers a friend, who wrote the business plan, and he worked for a community summer program, funded by the county’s health department. He highlights wonderful accounts of his years as a state employee, and working with the physically and mentally handicapped. Then there was his service in law enforcement: here and in another state. The man’s professional career peaked and ended some time ago.  Now at the lower rung of the totem, he is without the better things in life. 

Employment these days is not gainful and the jobs he works are not by choice, but Jonathan needs money. A good job a job with the right pay and work environment is exactly what he needs. Good jobs are difficult to find, and Jonathan is aging, his 60th birthday approaches and let’s face it, advancing age advances unemployment. (The executive listens intently; Jonathan has gained her deepest interest.)

The interview slowly ending: Jonathan restores his files and then he reaches for the package near his chair.

Displaying the framed poem, Jonathan begins, “Even if there is no place for me here, would you do me a favor?” Handing the poem to the executive, he goes on, “Could you please find a place for this?” The guy explains that he is not an artist; he cannot create beautiful portraits or landscapes on canvas, but is able to portray his mental images by drawing with words.

He says, “Maybe others would find a little of ‘them’ in my expressions. This would be wonderful. I couldn’t want for more.” The relationships living in his phrases cause the executive to raise her eyebrows, she shakes her head while glancing at the words.

Emotions overwhelm the executive, the man’s unusually creative attempts to acquire employment impress her. She is encouraged though not totally swayed by the sincerity witnessed in Jonathan’s face.

After all, as a top executive managing a business, she cannot afford to be erroneous. She would never choose based (purely) on a matter of feelings. Her people are the best in what they do…whatever they do.

Staring at Jonathan’s face, the woman wonders if he realizes the redness and tears in his eyes, the fact that his wells are soon to overflow. The executive is incredulous of the man’s professional accounts, also of his tender displays, she, well, for lack of a better term, feels even ‘proud’ of this stranger who has shared with her his story.

The two stand and end the session. Shaking hands, they say goodbye and thank you. The executive asks about the inspiration for his poem: Jonathan tells her that the inspiration was the song “Hero,” sang by Mariah Carey and Luciano Pavarotti. He offers, “The song sensitively touched me, causing me to cry.”

“Incredible,” the executive offers softly. Escorting Jonathan to her office door, and then firmly clasping his hand she says, “We will contact you soon.”

(During his trip home, Jonathan feels uncertainty; though he somehow is able to smile.)

Copyright © 2011 Delbert H. Rhodes